I have concluded it was a mistake to post this particular essay. I wrote it for my family- as the preface stated- as a way to say some things that I have very much wanted to say for years. They received it as I intended. I shared it with the IM audience with some reluctance. It has become apparent that my detractors in the blogosphere are reading the essay in a different context; as a description of my ordinary, daily approach to my life and calling; as my typical mental state in the pulpit. One has announced that I am a “fraud.” Since the essay has been excerpted in the cause of demonstrating that I am mentally unstable, unfit for the ministry and possibly not a Christian, I think it is safe to say the misuse of the essay now outweighs its potential good use. Those these interpretations are perversely, purposefully absurd, I take responsibility for the lack of clarity in the essay. I reluctantly have removed it.
He had the audacity to admit what so many other pastors insist must not be acknowledged: that there is a cost to ministry, that some men really aren't called to be preachers, and that those men are no less important to the Body of Christ than their counterparts in the pulpit. Some of them may even be better Christians than their shepherds. And therein lies the ego bruise for these self-satisfied sphincters.
So thanks a lot, jackasses. I hope you can return to your pulpits (even if they're only electronic ones) with the pride of knowing that you have protected your hegemony by leaving a wounded fellow-soldier out for the buzzards.
For those whose faith is greater than their egos, the essay is still available by request. I highly recommend it. You might stop by and offer Michael some support as well. He's a brilliant writer, an honest man, and someone I'm proud to call "brother."
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